I’m sat here the day after filming writing the blog to go with this video and am a little apprehensive about posting it. I know I’ve mentioned that I have mild depression before and that I’ve had rubbish days but it is still a hard thing for me to just openly say. I always imagine people rolling their eyes and seeing me as attention seeking when I would rather not been seen or thought of by anyone in times like this. My depression makes me turn inwards and I am very unkind to myself. I would never say or think things I do to myself about anyone else. I don’t think I could have a worse enemy than my own brain at times.
I know this will pass and it’s just a case of riding it out, it’s just unfortunate that it falls in a vlogging month and right before Tobin’s birthday. I don’t think the timing is random though, I have some family issues (yeah more family issues, who’d have thought with so few family members I could have yet more issues!) and the lockdown and isolation all play a part too.
I would like to thank anyone and everyone who has taken time to be a part of the channel and brightened my day with a like or a comment and for anyone struggling or feeling down, please know people do care and if you ever need someone to talk to I am here. Even if you don’t know what to say, you don’t always have to come right out and say how you’re feeling, a conversation about something completely different might lift your spirits just from the interaction with someone outside of your own head!